I'm officially out of sorts....

I took a nap this afternoon since I got up at 5:30 and stitched, thinking it would help my mood in the shop tonight. Well guess what it didn't work. It's slow for Friday so you would think I'd be able to relax and enjoy my stitching...but no....first of all I've had an idiot in here for 1/2 hr. talking on her phone and I can relay the entire conversation for you. She is apparently buying a home and is talking to a friend who she is explaining the entire deal to including the fact that she's taking someone with her to purchase it so they can't pull any fast ones on her. 1/2 hour people..why the hell is she in here to begin with....the reception isn't that good...talk outside for God's sake...I don't give a damn. God, if I only had Vernon's stun gun..... Then at the same time...I have Ms. Indecision at the counter as she tells me all about her Vera Bradley collection. As you well know I'm going out of Vera so I don't give a damn about her collection either. I'm over Vera...O.K...over and done! But the worse part is she can't make up her mind which Travelers Case to buy, Windsor Blue, which she already has 3 pieces of given to her by her daughter and co-workers, or the Mesa Red which her co-worker has and she likes it to, but everything she has is blue...etc., etc.,etc.,etc. I don't know how she got to this age without being able to make a decision. She called her niece to get her opinion (and told her she was in the shop below 5th street...hello...I'm between 8th & 9th lady!) I'm telling you if this bitch doesn't get off her phone I'm going to take it and hit her over the head with it. Honestly, and she is continually milling around the front counter the entire time so I can't miss one friggin word of her conversation. Jeez people, give the rest of us a break with the cell phones. Oh, for God's sake, she was about to get off and the idiot on the other end of the line started asking her about the layout so now she's describing it room by room...Good Golly, I might have to jump over this counter and you know I'm going to hurt myself doing it. Oh, wait a minute her daughter just beeped in...perhaps we'll hear all about her next. No, she actually hung up and didn't take the other call. Now she's running me around the shop...which I prefer to cell phone calls. Well as she was checking out she informed me that she has moved to Ocean Pines where she is signing the paper work on her new house this weekend. So she will now be a local...I'm mixed on this. I must inform her of cell phone etiquette while in Ocean City. The shop is once again quiet and I am at peace with the world. I forgot to tell you Ms Indecision finally, after getting her niece's opinion, settled on the Windsor Blue (I knew you couldn't rest until you found this out) and as she is leaving she thought it was approxiate to let me know she had shrimp for dinner at Shennagians and now she was having stomach cramps..but she was going to get a ginger ale and felt that would settle it down. Never once did I enter into any dialogue with this woman and yet I now know her medical issues. Do you see what I mean...I can't stop some of these people...they just have to let me know whatever they are thinking. Oh, for God's sake...another person who was minding her own business saw me typing and commented on how fast I was and wondered what I was working on. I explained about the blog and she then went on to talk computers with herself since I'm not listening at all, but the gist of it was she's on computers all day so she refuses to do anything with computers in her off time. Her daughter uses Vista and she hates Vista...even when I said I don't have Vista and had never used it that didn't stop her...she rambled on and on. Now her obnoxious children are in the store and she's screaming at them...Good Lord, where are the High School Seniors...at least they didn't even come in my store. Is it possible I'm too old to work here anymore? Well, what the hell is going on...is there a full moon or what? I'm minding my own business working on the blog when I hear "will you sew my dog an outfit?" I turn around and there standing beside the counter is a man who seriously is asking if I will make his dog, a Yorkie who seems to have ears that stand up, a superman cape and mask. HELLO...what part of this store looks like a fabric shop. I just said "NO" and turned back around, but did that stop him...no, he continued to walk around the counter to get in my face and continue talking. HELP...I've apparently entered the Twilight Zone and wasn't aware. And we have another cell phone caller. Shoot me, shoot me now, Please!!!! OK., I played a couple of computer games, I think I'm going to make it, but the woman talking about her cramps has given the idea to me...I think I'm cramping too...I need to find a 7 UP and rest. Where is Sara when I need her. Oh, the power of suggestion...I'm starting to envision the Yorkie's superman costume..oh, oh, before I know it I'll be stitching one up....God help Me! Good Lord, while my shop is annoyance free, there is a troop of kids next door in Sea Trader that apparently have no parents who have brain cells working and are letting these children aged from about 3-8 pick everything up to look at it. No doubt breakage will occur which of course they won't take responsibility for...while we don't hold them responsible it is always nice to have them offer...which doesn't always occur. God...I hope they don't come over here. Well of course they did...thankfully Sara showed up and she handled it. I'm out of here and going home to have a good stiff drink...booze only nothing to mix it with, I'm getting drunk out of my gourd and pray for a better tomorrow.