Oh Crap....Huston we have a problem!

I had a couple of calls from customers to place orders over the phone because they couldn't do it on line. So I went on line last week to investigate and sure enough we had a problem. Realizing that the last time I had an issue with the cart was when the price of postage changed I called my web person and asked her to check it out. As would only happen to me, the person who changed the code on my postage was no longer with her and she couldn't figure out how he did it so suggested I use a monthly service which would alleviate the problems I've gone through when postage changed. That sounded like a sane idea so I contacted Doug and agreed to a monthly fee to plug in his services, which he assured me I could do myself. Of course I couldn't do it so I called my web person and told her to do it. Then when I saw she had done it on Saturday, I went in and ordered a $4 chart to test it and found a slight error since it was charging me $42.84 for shipping on $4. So I called Doug and said, I don't know what's wrong but clearly something is wrong. We realized it was the figure that in the past I put in to calculate shipping is wrong and I know have to go back through 189 pages, with 6 items per page and change all of those figures to get the correct shipping. So folks, as you know, this will take me a lot of time. But as you also know that shipping charge means nothing to me as I charge actual shipping, but in the meantime...my cart is now a work in progress so I ask for your patience as I work my way through this quagmire. Life sure is fun isn't it? To add to my stress, I got a call my from doctor's office to see if I wanted to come in for the flu shot. I said, "no thanks, but thanks for calling." And then she says, "Sally, you haven't been in here for 2 years and we need you to come in." I belong to what I call a boutique group as I pay yearly to belong to their practice as my doctor opted out of the HMO thing. So I said to her, "Look I pay you yearly so I don't have to come in." But apparently that is not what I'm paying for so after insisting I come whether I want to or not I went. Of course the first thing they do is insist I get on the damn scale. Crap I can tell you I've gained...hell I gain when I breathe. But she just looked at me, sympathic but unrelenting and I climbed on board and prayed for the best. I then went to wait for Wendy, my physician's assistant who likes to tell me about gastric bypass no matter how many times I tell her "No, and stop suggesting it." So she comes in, asked how I'm doing, I'm such a wreck over the anticipation of "our talk" that I have a mental breakdown. I'm telling you, I was a red hot mess and embarrassed and unable to figure out what to do with myself. Her determination..."Sally, I think you are suffering from depression." Hell yes, thinking about our talk about gastric bypass. I kept saying, "No I'm just having a moment, but I'm fine." Of course I was just thinking, "For God's sake move this weight train along and let me out so I can get some lunch." She was so taken back by my "depression" she never mentioned the weight...hey maybe I'm onto something here. Of course she then prescribed an antidepressent which has about Sara over the edge. While I know for certain that I'm not a depressed person...my cup is always half full trust me...I decided to go along with the program and take the meds for a month to see. Then I had to go to the hospital to have blood work. Since I hadn't eaten since the night before (who eats before they are getting on a scale, because let's face it...that little bit a weight makes up for 2 years of eating), anyway, I went right over where they did a chest x-ray (I had a cold which they probably thought was something else), and took 5 vials of blood. I usually only give 2 so I thought it was odd. Wendy called me that night to say my sugar levels were off the chart (I guess my C.A. Wells weekend eating cake and cookies wasn't out of my system yet) so I was put on medication for diabetes...I can handle that, plus I've gone back on the program so that will help. Then a couple a days ago they called again to say they got more of the tests back and my B12 was so low (I finally get a low figure and it's on something that needed to be high...damn the luck) I needed to start a series of B12 shots. Honestly, this is what I get for skipping 2 years. So now I'm running over there weekly for a B12 shot and while I'm not sure I notice any difference, perhaps I do have more pep in my step, but in any case I'm sure it can't hurt. Of course I still have to do the mammogram and the pap smear (I just love that test...I have no dignity left at all anyway). So folks, for the time I'm here, eating healthier and hoping to lose weight and get off the meds. By the way, after stewing about the weight...I'd lost 4 pounds in the last 2 years instead of gaining. So run a flag up the ole flag pole....let's hope I keep the trend going. At that rate I'll have a normal weight when I'm 200. Got to run...Mary and Brian have begun bringing my stash downstairs...haven't seen it in 5 years, I've uncovered some real treasures....and a whole lot of trash. It's funny how our tastes change.