I'm seriously going to bitch slap someone...

They really need to get me out of here and I mean fast. First of all at this point in the summer forget about socializing...it's all I can do to smile and I haven't been doing a lot of that lately...it's too much I tell you. Now I've got some non-stitcher in here who is telling me she purchased a pillow kit from here around 25 years ago...well at least we've narrowed down who hasn't helped me stay in business...now find me someone out there who has. She then tells me how she's not crafty...Gee how could I have know that without her telling me....this woman is a loony toon...get her out of here...ooh, thanks she just left. Now I can get back to playing solitare on the computer and going through catalogs. It's the strangest thing...the more the shop slows down the more I want to shop to bring more things in. Something is wrong with my system...perhaps it's that! Sara and Vernon have taken Michael to his first semi-pro football game in Salisbury...Michael is playing (O.K. technically not semi pro, but to me he is.) Vernon brought home his uniform for the game which we found today was about 1 1/2 inches too small in the waist. I just called Sara to see what's going on and she says he somehow managed to squeeze into it and we all know he's going to end up with a stomach ache from the damn pants. This has fiasco written all over it. Ladies we all know what pants feel like when they are too tight...he's 8...he doesn't get "just muscle through it" so I'm sure he's going to have something to say about it. Plus he has to be weighed in to make sure he's not overweight. Have you ever heard of anything so silly...he's 8. Sara's afraid he won't make weight...frankly I don't give a damn. He's 8!!!! Children at that age should not be playing night games which start around 6:30 p.m. 1 hour away from their home. He's 8 and he's going to be getting home around 9..hopefully ... on a school night. Because of the weight issue Sara couldn't feed him before leaving so now he's going to be eating around 9:00 p.m. Oh yea, this is a good idea. Michael gets cranky if he isn't fed every couple of hours...doesn't matter what it is ...fruit..usually, but food must enter the chute. Now he's going to be hungry, in pants 2 sizes too small, and tired. Boy this is going to be the perfect storm. Good luck to Sara and Vernon with this one. Non-stitcher #2..."I bet you do a terrific internet business because your inventory in here is so extensive" (like one thing has anything to do with the other...HELLO... Then she ...oh, please don't say it...said, "So all these samples where do you get them." I said all the ladies here do them...and this idiot says...looking at my Sail Away by Shepherd's Bush...sitting on the counter.."do you do them on the machine." Are you kidding me people...Shepherd's Bush done on the machine...she got out of here with her life but she was lucky...I was sitting and the energy to get up would have been too great. She's lucky I was standing, because I'd have had to take her down... Now I'll wait for non-stitcher #3 because you know she's going to be here any minute. No, the nut job this time was a man who came in Salty Yarns through Sea Trader and didn't pay attention to that fact and thought we were a shop jammed with card racks so he announces to me that he doesn't have enough time to look through all the cards, turns around and walks out...for which I was grateful....and my night moves on at a snails pace and to make it worse I'm missing Survivor..Damn..now I'm madder than I was 5 minutes ago. Did hear from Sara, Michael did play and his team lost but he had fun, tight pants and all. Me...well it's 8:45..Survivor is almost over and I haven't seen any of it. The store is now empty so I think I'll just call it a day. I'm tired of the looky loo's who don't have the time or patience to stitch in the first place. Stitchers...I need you in here to balance this out. Have a great night and I'll talk to you later.

Jane Timmer news.....

For those intending to attend the Jane Timmer class in April in 2010 (I can't believe we have to discuss this already), I need to have your names as she has the Americana Boxes and she's putting the kits together, and since it's a pre-stitch we want them asap. To update you...Jane will be teaching "More Finer Points of Finishing". This is actually Part III of the Finer Points of Finishing. Students will continue to expant their repertoire of finishing techniques by making a set project that features hands-on techniques not previously covered in Parts I and Part II, plus expanded text covering these techniques. The project is a new set of accessories based on a design theme of quilt stars stitched on linen in primitive colors. The set includes a lined rectangular box, a small case with needle page and scissors pocket, a sandwich pinkeep, a tape measure pocket and a scissors fob. The finishing techiques covered are: Folded book finish with slipstitch join, Sandwich pinkeep, Lining a rectangular/square box, Scissors fob (laced backstitch) and Sewn pocket. In order to take this class you much have taken Part I or have Jane's permission. So please let me know if you intend to take this class so that we can get your supplies to you.

Need help!!!

We have a stitcher coming from Boyce, Virginia which is around Hagerstown, Rockville apparently, and she would like to car pool down for Jamboree. If anyone is interested, please let me know and I'll get you together. Thanks so much.

It was suppose to rain...darn it I wanted the rain

It's like waiting for a snow day. In the morning there is the promise of rain today...that means I could close tonight, but did the rain come...nooooo, of course not, it's overcast, but no rain so here I sit...having to deal with some non-stitchers. I just don't have the patience any more. If another woman asks me the price of a model, I inform her they are samples of things she can make and then she giggles and says, "oh, I don't have the time or patience for that," I swear I might just climb over this counter...O.K., reality check...by the time I got across the counter it would be October, so now I'm wondering just how close do you have to be to zap them with a stun gun. And would I be better off dragging their ass across the boardwalk and dumping them on the beach and then claiming I have no idea how they got there, or do I just sit them in a chair in the shop and use them as a display. I'm not sure...a little more thought might be needed here. And those who can't tell their left hand from their right...honestly, think a moment lady, or is that too difficult as well. (I have to admit that when asked to raise my left hand I think a moment before raising the correct hand, after all I don't want to irrate anyone, I want to be right so I'd rather they thought I was slow, not stupid.) Anyway I was asked where a certain chart was so I told her it was to her left, so she turned right, and said "No your right" and then she held up both arms trying to get her baring, so I said, "It's right to your left, Rack 5, " and she turned around and stared at it and I could tell she didn't see it even if I did tell her the names of the other 2 companies on the rack. Just as I was about to get up and take her hand and put it on the chart, her friend came from next door, said, "I'll show her" and she found it instantly because apparently she brought her brain with her...thank God. Then I just had a man tell his wife she had 15 minutes..as he was the big sport and put a quarter in the parking meter so she could have a big 15 minutes to shop. 15 minutes in a needlework store...well isn't he just precious...a real keeper. Next time he's watching football she ought to give him 15 minutes to watch and then turn off the T.V. Jackass. But at least I was spared anymore of his crap as when he told her she had until 5:10 and she asked what time it was and I said, "It's 5:10" they paid and left. It's been a long, long summer for me...I need to go home! Well, I'm bored, we haven't seen anyone, stitching or otherwise for 1/2 hour, I'm closing and going home. Whoppee....see you on my sofa....I'll be the one with my head back, my mouth open and snoring. Even in sleep I'm a lovely sight (sight being the key word here).

It's here...it's finally here....

The 2009 Just Cross Stitch ornaments magazine hit the shop today and what a wonderful magazine it is. While it has tons of ornaments, this year it also has a Scissors safe by Rae Iverson and a Christmas Joy Needlebook by Louise Henderson. The ornaments are the stars of this show and they are a feast for the eyes. I tried to pick my favorite and just could not. I love many of them from our favorite designers...so make sure you get your copy. Other than that it's been a wash out down here. We've had rain off and on for the last 3 days, and today it is pouring. The poor visitors who came into town last weekend have not seen the sun since they've been here. They are getting a bit grumpy from it and I'm loving it because not only have the temps gone down but....I get to go home early. Yes, two nights ago I was home by 4:30...last night by 8:30 and today I think I'm sneaking out at 4:00...whoppee! I need the break. Yesterday I worked morning in the shop along with Pat and we decided there had to be a full moon. People were nuts. One of the first women to come into the shop carrying our "green bag" which is always a bad sign, pulled an open kit out of the bag and said, "I hope you can help me. We purchased this kit in here the other night and my friend can't do it, so we want to return it." I look at the bag it came in and it's torn to hell of course, so I said, "I'm sorry, but you've torn open the bag. Once they are torn open like that we can't sell them therefore we can't take them back." To which this brain trust said,"but everything is here." "yes, I said, I'm sure it is, but that isn't the problem...the problem is that the kit is torn open, I can't sell a kit that you had to tear open." To which the Brain Trust said, "You could take it" indicating that I could take the tape and run it over the top of the kit and tape it to the other side. Can you picture it? I was by this time ready to move on, clearly she was not...so I said again, "I'm sorry but no one is going to buy a kit that has been torn open and taped." And yet this idiot wasn't giving up..."But the yarn is all here." "Yes I said, I'm sure it is...but again, it's been torn open and can't be returned." So she goes over to the rack where she picked this up and came back and said, "There are other kits over there in zip top bags." "Yes," I said, because the manufacturers put them in them. The manufacture of this kit uses the sealed bags. And I don't have bags for these in the shop...I'm sorry, you may not return it. Why don't you find a friend who doesn't counted cross stitch and ask them to do it for you." With that she and the friend flounced out of the shop to go bother someone else. You know...the kit was a birth announcement which sold for $16.00. Now I'm not saying any of us want to lose $16.00, and you all know I will fight you to the ground for 25 cents, so I don't take this lightly. But if you purchase something, rip off the packaging, what am I suppose to do with that. Is it my responsibility to get bags and put it in a new package...and how do I know you haven't lost a part of it, or used some of the floss. People are always misplacing charts or threads from a kit and coming to me to get replacements which if I can I always try to assist with this. The return policy states that opened kits, floss, charts are not returnable. Why do some people feel it's alright for a policy to be in place but they get to ignore it? People this crap wears me out. The day ended with a woman coming in with 2 different shoes on, and a sock on one foot only. Pat and Renee studied her for some time and tried to come up with a reason why this was happening. I frankly didn't give a damn. I say let her wear whatever she wants. In the end Renee had to ask or she wouldn't be able to sleep. And there was a perfectly good reason...she had an artificial heal and ankle and had to keep the sock on because of that. The shoe on the one foot was for comfort and the other because of necessity. Mystery solved and the end of our day. Going home early was like a snow day for me. I got there and flitted from one thing to another too excited to really get anything done. I finally had to sit myself down and give me a stern lecture, at which point I did do some laundry and wash some dishes and start bringing order out of kaos...of course that lasted only about 1/2 hour and then I felt that I deserved some stitching time and finished one of the Halloween stockings. We now have 6 done (I say we because Phyllis let me use 4 of hers so we would have a decent display for Jamboree). Jamboree...oh, it's exciting. Oops...got to go...time to close the shop...yippee...I get to go home I think...oh, no I don't Sara has to go to open house at school...O.K. I take back the whoppee...but I do get to go home as soon as she returns...o.k., a little whoppee. Talk to you later.

Oh, my God....as usual the one nut in town finds us...

yWell, perhaps nut isn't the correct word, but frankly I don't give a darn (at least I cleaned that up). Anyway, I'm in the shop working my shift counting down the minutes...I'm in the back helping someone find something when I heard a shuffling noise and then someone speaking in a tongue I certainly couldn't understand, so I walk back up to the front and I knew it wasn't going to be good when I saw the abandoned walker. And I see an older (turns out he is 72) sitting on the stool behind the counter, pulled up to the counter trying to explain something to the gentlemen who had the misfortune of being in the chair on the other side of the counter just waiting for his wife. The old guy meanwhile was sitting on my almost completed project...sitting there and he was none to clean. I think he must work on cars for a living if anything because his hands and nails were filthy so I didn't give a damn if my needle stuck him in his ass, I just wanted him off my needlework. So I sit in my chair, tap him on the ass and said "Sir you need to get off my needlework." I have to say he was most apologetic (I think who knows, I couldn't understand him but he looked the part.) I could see the other man couldn't help as he couldn't understand him either, plus I knew it was going to be a long night if I didn't do something so I told him to state the problem slowly so I could help him. He drove in from Virginia to go on the beach apparently, although he sure didn't look like it...anyway, between the car and the beach he lost his keys and I'm not sure if he lost his money as well, but anyway, the police had been to him twice and I'm sure couldn't get away fast enough, but left him after calling a locksmith. But they didn't give him any info on when the locksmith or if the locksmith was coming. He had no concept of time that this happened and since it's 9 p.m. I can't believe he just went on the beach, so I'm thinking it had to take place this afternoon. Anyway, I called both locksmith and surprise surprise, answering machines. I can't believe the police left his guy here without trying to help him out, more than just calling a locksmith. I mean the guy can't speak English for God's sake. Oh my God... he just rolled back in on his walker to ask me to plug in his phone overnight so it would be charged. Honestly, now I'm the center for the homeless. I know my mother would be proud, my father would be saying "Call the police and let them do their job", but here I am with this poor man who will be sleeping in his car tonight. If we weren't packed at the hotel I know I would have given him a bed...why me God...of all the places he could have gone tonight why here? There are more than 142 blocks in Ocean City and yet they all end up on mine. I can't wait for Connie to show up tomorrow and try to deal with this. I told Sara about my exciting evening as she never came back to the shop since she was dealing with a noisy tenant (we all have our problems apparently), but after telling her she went and got his cell phone to see if we could call someone to come help him. After seeing there were over 300 contacts and all of them middle eastern we decided the hell with it since I figured they wouldn't understand a word I said. Then I stupidly said, "Perhaps it's a bomb" and Sara was off and running. She announced the cell phone would be the detonator for a bomb placed somewhere on the property. It was at that point I decided to get the hell out of Dodge and went home leaving Sara and Vernon to deal with the problem without me. I mean I've had a touch enough year with mixing it up with a bomb. Sara was a little indignant that I was leaving she and Michael in the bomb zone, but hey, I was tired and needed a nap. Sara did go out to see if he was asleep in his car, (which to me meant no bomb since he would be too close to ground zero and would take the hit as well...of course Sara pointed out suicide bombers...but really what are the changes this 72 year old man became that at this late date) and he was sleeping in the backseat so she felt better about the bomb theory. I arrived back at work this morning to take up where we left off last night and there he was sitting on the porch wondering where his cell phone was since Connie and Pat had no idea we had taken it over to the hotel. So I went out to once more deal with our little man and called the locksmith who informed me they wouldn't touch a Mercedes. So I called another locksmith who at first told me they had tried to help him last night but he refused to pay $145 for the key. So I went out and confronted the man who said, "I'll pay", so I called the locksmith back and said, bring the key he's going to pay. Of course, the person with the key was off today, so they called him and he told them that it wasn't that he wouldn't pay, the key wouldn't work because it needed a chip that had to be gotten from the dealership. So I go back out and explain that what I had told him before was not the case and there was no working key but I was going to call the mercedes dealership in Salisbury. They said they would do nothing over the phone, but bring the man in with identification and car registration, etc., etc., etc., and then they would see about getting another key. By this time I'm getting a little testy in that no one seem to be willing to help the man except my crew...and I have Vernon, Mary, Sara and myself on this, on a day when we were having a mass checkout. So I'm figuring someone will have to take this old gentlemen over to Salisbury to get the process started and go back outside to tell him and there he is with a smile and Sara looking like (holy crap...why are we dealing with this on Labor Day)...apparently he found the key in his pocket (yes, his pocket). So I tried to stay nice and smiled and said, "Well, you put that key in your ignition, start your car and get home to Washington." Bless his heart, he hugged me like I was his long lost sister (although perhaps I should say lover since that hug went on so long I thought he'd passed out.) 1/2 later Vernon went to fill the soda machines and the man was still on 8th St. The neighbors had gotten into by now and told Vernon his battery was dead. Meanwhile he had at least 4 tickets on his car and Vernon had already told the meter reader to stop ticketing his car and explained the situation so they put a note on it to tell other meter readers to leave the car alone. He had tried to get everyone that stopped and parked on 8th street to help him, and one Mexican gentlemen told him as soon as his children got done changing their clothes (in the middle of 8th street no less) he would try to help. But in the end it was Vernon and the boys from Malibu Surf Shop that pushed his car out into the street so that Vernon could get his truck in place to give him a boost. So people I'm proud to say it took all of us to accomplish it, but we have managed to get the 72 year old man who doesn't speak English off the block...I wouldn't guarantee he made it home to Virginia, but we know he made it off 8th street and that's my personal zone to take care of so now I'm free to tackle other problems. I have to say though, I am ashamed that the police force in town didn't help this gentlemen more. He had 2 business cards from the 2 officiers who apparently came to help him, but all they did was call the locksmith. I'd hate to think that if my father had been in a foreign land (O.K. so he was from Virginia but I'm telling you he barely spoke English) didn't know the language and couldn't find anyone to help him. What was the man to do? I thought that was what the police were for! We even called a policeman we knew to see if he could help and he just said, "Well there's not much we can do." Oh, yea, well for starters how about seeing if the gentlemen needs something to eat or some water. How about finding him a place to sleep, even if that means at the police station. How about giving a damn people. What if this was you? I have always tried (and failed many times) to remember that I may be the best memory someone has of Ocean City. While the people peeing in my parking lot don't see the best side of me, let's face it I didn't see the best side of them either and don't care what they remember about me. But when it's a visitor in need, well I'd like them to think of Ocean City as a kind place to be with people who give a damn. One year on the way to Hawaii, my parents stopped for a few nights in San Francisco and my father had something go terribly wrong with one of his teeth. He was in such pain the hotel called a local dentist who came in to his office on the weekend for Dad, fixed his tooth...and sit down here it comes...didn't charge him. Wished him a wonderful time in their city and a wonderful vacation! Now that goes way beyond the call of duty, but the point is after visiting Hawaii my father could only talk about how wonderful that dentist was. And how he saved their vacation. Now I may not have saved the man's vacation...but at least he knows the people at this hotel were concerned and tried to help. (Please don't let that get around, I'm not sure how nice we'll be next time.) Anyway, that's been out Labor Day....full of drama as usual...hope you had a better time. And we're dealing with rain, which brings up another point. I left my house this morning thinking...everyone will get up and get out early due to the weather....did that happen? NO...This is something I don't understand. On check out day, I always get up, get packed, check out and then stop on the way out to eat. That so doesn't happen here. They get up, get their continental breakfast, go shopping, go walk one last time on the beach and barely get back here in time to check out, then ask if they can leave their car on the lot so they can do one last walk down the boardwalk and shop. They all say the same thing..."we're trying to miss the traffic going home." Well folks you can't miss it if you all stay into the afternoon. When it's time to go home...go home I say. Don't drag it out and then tell me next year how much traffic there was so you're thinking of staying even later. They're driving me nuts folks! Yes, Nuts!

I feel almost human again...

Tough summer down here, what with the "crack whore", Sara's "Crack Daddy", freight lift fiasco, personal elevator fiasco, and a heat index of 110 degrees. But the weather for the last few days has been delightful...O.K., the temps are down and it's been overcast for a great part of the day, but that just means we sit inside and stitch so what do we care? While I do get tired of hearing the bitching from the non-stitchers about not being able to go on the beach...well, they can go on it they just won't get a tan...I don't see the problem here. Anyway, I'm back at work after a week of resting...alright I wasn't resting but we had a mini retreat. Debbie L. & Phyllis Y. came down and we sat and stitched everyday, and then they came to work with me and we stitched while I worked. I got so much done on my ornament exchange piece I know I'll be done with it soon (you don't have to applaud me, I'll do it myself). So I'm rested and thrilled to just to be here. Now will be a true test of my endurance however, as the foreign students leave us to run the 4 stores and the hotel by ourselves (thanks alot kids...!)...but we're use to this end rush and while we bitch and complain we always get through it. I had a "Come to Jesus" meeting with the head honchos of the elevator company. That was an exercise in futility. I wrote the company a letter explaining what I thought of them (I spare you that profanity here)...and so they called and wanted a sit down with Vernon, Sara and myself. I can't tell you how unproductive that was. While P.J. was repentent...Bo who is actually the one that comes on site to check on things was one of those people who wouldn't take responsibility for anything that went wrong. I started by restating what I had already said in my letter. I thought they had nerve, were unprofessional, and were just plain "stinky" (O.K., perhaps stinky was never muttered. but it should have been. When I said what nerve they had to send me a notorized copy of the final bill asking for payment on the private elevator...Bo said, "notorized, what is that about...I didn't know they notorized the bills." More importantly I mentioned to this idiot, "You didn't finish the work!" I said, "out of the six items to be done on the contract, you had only done 2, and you never replaced the gates which was part of the contract." And now, folks...here is what that jackass said to me...hold on to your hat cause you aren't going to believe this...Bo said, "I thought we had finished it...and as far as the gates go, that company has gone out of business so we aren't able to get them." First asshole, you are the company that installed them so find them..and secondly, I noticed you didn't reduce the bill because of that or any of the other shit you didn't do. Honestly, if I had a gun, well, let's just say it wouldn't have been pretty. I finally said, "I'm done here" and left. But the saga continues. Today I got a letter stating that my July invoice (the notorized bill that said the work was completed) has not been paid. You think? Well guess what folks...it's not getting paid anytime soon. These men might think I'll give up but they so don't know me. I'll go down with the ship. Instead of seeing a light at the end of the tunnel...I'm starting to envision the bottom of the sea. We'll see who cracks first. After a summer of dealing with the likes of the "crack whore"...well these elevator people just don't stand a chance. The Labor Day weekend is upon us and while that is usually a tame time due to lack of thousands of people, this year we do have plenty of people to take up my parking...oops, I mean to occupy the rooms. It helps us that the Americana, just 2 blocks away, is still condemned because they didn't bother to give their reservations much notice so by last week when they were informed they didn't have a place to stay...well let's just say we went on the call list. So Thank you Americana, sorry you had to close, but we thank you for your tenants. The weather has warmed up for the weekend so folks, Ocean City is the place to be...warm temps, beautiful ocean and a clean beach. Does it get any better? I pray you have a safe and fun holiday weekend. While the shop is still open from 10:00 a.m. to 9:55 p.m. (I close 5 minutes early so I'm not there until 11:00 p.m.)...this might change at any minute. Usually our foreign students are gone by the 2nd week of September, but this year we have some until the end of September. Since I've always blamed their not being here for my going back to our winter schedule of 10:00 a.m. to 4:00 p.m....I'm having mixed emotions here. I'm pooped and so ready to go home at 4:00 p.m. so I can get that nap in. I miss that 4:00 nap so I'm looking forward to it again. Well, if you are down here...call to check on our closing time at this point. I hate hearing about people who came all the way to the shop at night only to find me gone!!!! Talk to you soon...have a great weekend.